The Suicide Killer Read online

  The Suicide Killer

  Zach Lamb

  Copyright © 2020 by Zach Lamb

  Artwork: Adobe Stock: © andreiuc88

  Design: Services for Authors

  All rights reserved.

  No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission of the author or Crooked Cat/darkstroke except for brief quotations used for promotion or in reviews. This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, and incidents are used fictitiously.

  First Dark Edition, darkstroke. 2020

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  This book is dedicated to the memory of my Dad, who taught me how to love books.

  Acknowledgements

  I wrote the dedication for this book before starting these acknowledgments, so now I must proceed through blurry eyes. I promise to try not to be overly sentimental. Ever since my Dad handed me a copy of Jurassic Park in sixth-grade and said, “here I think you would like this,” I have been hooked. He was the greatest inspiration for my love of reading and talking about books. Though we didn’t read the same genres, we spent many conversations excitedly talking about what we were currently reading. Thanks, Dad.

  Now, I need to thank the driving force behind why I have the opportunity to write these words. My wife, Tina, has been so much for me that I am afraid to list anything for fear of leaving something off. If not for her encouragement and support in going to college and then pursing my MFA, I wouldn’t be half the writer I am today. She believed in me and had patience with me when I had none for myself.

  Thank you Greenlee for showing me what hard work and determination are. You’re my hero for so many reasons; for so many ways.

  I’d also like to thank my Mom, Taylor, and Katelyn (sorry Taylor’s name is first, but he is older than you) for their continued support. Thank you to all my friends and family for the motivation when asking about my book, especially during the submission process.

  Thank you to the Columbus State University English Department for enriching my life as well as every student who walks into Arnold Hall. And to the Southern New Hampshire University MFA program for helping me hone my craft.

  I have read many books that have inspired my writing which I could only hope to live up to, I would be remiss if I didn’t thank the unnamed author who inspired this writing journey when after reading their book I said, “man, I can do this. It can’t be that hard.” Of course, I was wrong and have spent the last few years realizing how much so.

  Finally, to the readers, especially those who have taken the time to read these acknowledgements, I thank you for taking a chance on my book and hope you stick around to see what I come up with next.

  About the Author

  Zach Lamb is a fictionist who creates thriller, horror and dark fiction stories. The characters that inhabit his stories are as broken and flawed as the people we see in the mirror every day. They jump the borders of a black and white world and swim in the grey areas where life is truly lived. Zach has an MFA in creative writing from Southern New Hampshire University. He lives with his wife and kids in the non-fictional town of Ellerslie, Georgia, named after the fictional character Captain Ellerslie from the Waverley Novels.

  The Suicide Killer

  Chapter One

  Bobby Cotton watched the clock on the wall. The cadence of the second hand lulled him to sleep. He had not been able to sleep much lately. There didn’t seem to be any reason for his insomnia, but as he dozed he contemplated taking the clock above the door home with him. Nobody would miss it anyway. The second hand crossed the eleven on the emotionless face, and Bobby snapped upright. It was twelve minutes until she would walk around the corner to the Daily Grind Coffee Shoppe and order a coffee with skim milk and lite sugar. He poured a full pitcher of coffee in the sink and started a fresh pot. Danielle had been coming to the coffee shop every day on her lunch break for the past six months since she began working as the secretary at Arkwright Construction. She would sit by the window while Bobby tried to busy himself with his mundane tasks. He would steal glances as she watched cars going down the street until her lunch break was over and she left him once again. He would wait for tomorrow when he would definitely start a meaningful conversation with her.

  11:45. Danielle walked around the corner. His breath caught in his throat as he ran a dry cloth across the spotless counter. The bell rang, and she walked into the coffee shop. The chime always seemed to be louder when she walked in. The reverberations ran through his entire body. Echoes bounced off her chestnut hair.

  “Good afternoon. Welcome to the Daily Grind,” Bobby said, a little too eager. “What…” Bobby cleared his throat. “What can I get for you?”

  Danielle looked up as she dug through her purse. “Hey, I’ll take a regular coffee with skim milk and lite sugar, please.”

  “And a name for the order?” Bobby asked, already writing her name on the side of the cup.

  Danielle looked down and brushed her hair behind her ear. “You know, I would think after all this time you would remember my name and what I order.”

  “Oh, I remember your name and your order, but I always figure the one time that I have your coffee waiting for you, you will change your order.” He poured the milk and sugar into her coffee.

  “So, are you afraid that I will change my name too?” she asked, blushing.

  He laughed nervously. “No, I just wouldn’t want to get your drink mixed up with everybody else’s.”

  He looked around at the empty coffee house. Danielle laughed. He handed her the change and watched as she walked across the room to her usual table and stared out the window. He busied himself as usual by wiping down the clean tables when she spoke.

  “I see you when I’m at the park, walking my dog.”

  The sudden change in routine caught him off guard, and he didn’t hear what she had said.

  “What? I mean excuse me?” he asked, correcting himself to sound polite. The kind of politeness that only comes from years working in customer service; fake and detached.

  “My dog, Charlie. When I take him to the park, I see you there a lot. Do you live nearby?”

  “Yeah, I live in the neighborhood beside the park. I like to go there when I get off work.”

  The truth was Bobby didn’t really care for the park too much. He would use the long forgotten bike trail that ran from the corner of the park to the edge of the woods beside his house as a shortcut. By cutting through the park, he could walk to work instead of driving. Walking seemed more economical to him even though the drive was only a few miles. One afternoon after working late, he saw Danielle walking her dog. Ever since that day, he would hang around the coffee shop thirty minutes after his shift in hopes he would somehow muster up the courage to talk to her like it was a coincidental meeting.

  Danielle smiled, and pushed her hair behind her ear as she looked down at the coffee on the table. Bobby didn’t notice the awkward air between them and went back to wiping the finish off of the counter. He looked up to say something to her, but the chime stopped him.

  “Dani, I’ve been looking all over for you. I finally got somebody in that place to tell me where you went.”

  Danielle looked at Bobby and then behind him to the man walking toward her.

  “I can’t believe you were harassing them, Mike. Those are the people I work with.”

  Mike pushed past Bobby and continued to Danielle’s table.

  “Well, if they had just told me which way you went, I
would have left. I told them we had a lunch date, but they didn’t care.”

  “Lunch date? We broke up. There are no more lunch dates. You should have made lunch plans with your girlfriend.”

  “Come on, Dani. I told you I was sorry. I’m going to break up with her,” Mike said, and grabbed the back of the chair in front of him like he was going to sit down.

  Danielle stuck her feet between the chair rungs and pulled it against the table.

  “You’re going to? So you still haven’t broken up with her?”

  “It’s not that easy. We’ve been together a long time. She gets emotional when I try.”

  Mike pulled the chair and Danielle yanked it back to the table.

  “I can’t believe I’m sitting here listening to this crap. Get out and leave me alone. I’m done with you. I’m not going to be your side girl, and even if you did break up with her, I wouldn’t date you. If you would cheat on her, then you would cheat on me too.”

  “No, I wouldn’t. You’re the one I want to be with.”

  “Sir, I’m going to have to ask you to leave now,” Bobby said from behind Mike.

  “Who the hell are you? You’re not part of this conversation.”

  “I’m the guy who works here. And you’re being loud and obnoxious and bothering all of my customers,” Bobby said, and spread his arms, surveying the empty room.

  Mike laughed, and walked toward Bobby.

  “Right. All of your customers may get upset.” Mike pushed Bobby out of his way and walked to the door. Bobby twisted the rag around his palm and stepped toward Mike.

  “Don’t worry, Dani. I’ll break up with her like I promised, and then I’ll find you,” Mike said, turning to face Danielle again and stopping Bobby in his tracks.

  “Go home to your girlfriend,” Danielle yelled as the door shut behind him.

  The lunchtime rush was about to start, and he wouldn’t have time to talk to her now. It was almost 12:15 and she would be leaving soon. He walked to the counter as a new customer entered. He watched her from across the room as he filled the new order. Danielle kneaded her forehead with her fingers. Stray hair fell from behind her ear and curled around the bottom of her cup. What was he thinking when he jumped into their conversation? Normally he would never have done that. He would have gone back behind the counter and waited for them to leave and be glad when it was over. This time was different though. He had gotten mad at the way this Mike guy was acting and treating Danielle. He wanted to stop him. He wanted to hurt him and had to hold himself back from hitting the guy. At first, he thought it was because of Danielle, but there was another reason. There was no label for it. He just wanted Mike to be in pain.

  Danielle got up and walked toward the front counter. His heart beat faster as he watched her approach.

  “Maybe the next time we’re both in the park, we could walk together or something,” she said, and smiled at him.

  “Uh. Yeah.” Was all he could get out before she turned, and walked out the door.

  The rest of the day was a blur. He relived her invitation over and over in his head. He imagined all the things he wished he would have said, and should have said. In his mind he was suave, he didn’t have to worry about how he sounded, or how he looked, he always knew what to say, and in the end, he would have her.

  It was getting close to the time Bobby got off work when one of the baristas taking his place showed up early. It was Thursday and Danielle would be in the park this evening. His daydreams and busy afternoon distracted him from the real opportunity to spend time with her. His palms dampened, and sweat ran down his brow. He went to the back and asked Denise if she would mind clocking in early because he felt sick. With a concerned look, she agreed.

  Bobby stepped outside the shop and panicked. Fighting to remain calm, he walked around the building, but as he approached the contractor’s office, he picked up the pace and ran. He hoped she hadn’t seen his cowardly flash go by the window. It was only two blocks to the park entrance. If he ran to the gate, he’d get a hold of himself and walk the rest of the way home. The sign for Rusted Lakes Park mocked him as if crossing its border could do anything to help him. After a few steps, he lost his nerve and ran. He cleared the gravel parking lot and the open field, and cut through the playground. Gawking children hanging from monkey bars and fire poles looked on. He reached the opening to the tired bike trail and stopped to catch his breath. After hiding in the foliage for a few minutes, the pulse in his ears dissipated, and his breathing became regular. Bobby wanted to run again, but didn’t because the trail was overgrown and branches stuck out, ready to trip him. He knew she wouldn’t be chasing him and felt foolish. He walked deeper into the woods, kicking at the loose pebbles that littered the path. The route sloped slightly to a curve where he would have to push into the thick brush and enter his neighborhood on the backside. The bushes never seemed to give. No matter how many times he pushed through, they always moved back overnight and lay in wait for him to return.

  Bobby hiked out of the woods into a long forgotten cul-de-sac in the back of the Lonesome Pines subdivision. Cracks ran across the pavement, and once green weeds sprouted through the flaws in the surface. He walked into the house on the corner lot, entering the old turn around. He lived alone in the timeworn two-story house inherited from his grandmother. The house was still decorated in the outdated style as it had when his grandparents bought the place. He walked into the dimly lit kitchen and sat at the table with a glass of water.

  Three hours later he was still sitting at the table, staring at the untouched water. His mind was blank. He no longer thought about his day and how he had been a coward for no reason at all. He was ready to fight Mike but was afraid to talk to the girl who thought he was helping. Calling out of work sounded like a good idea, but he never missed work. There was no reason to let the events of the day effect work. Work was all he had left. The mundane broke the trance, and he trudged up the stairs, past the fading wallpaper, to his bedroom. He fell on his bed, and went straight to sleep.

  For the next week, Bobby didn’t stay late after work. When it was time for him to get off at five, he waited patiently for Danielle to leave work, to go pick up her dog. Then he would hurry out the door and into the park. While at work, he thought everything was going fine. Danielle would come in, and he would make her coffee and suffered through small talk, then she would leave. After a few days, the tension he initially felt had subsided, and he almost felt like things were getting back to normal.

  On Friday, Danielle walked into the shop, and didn’t look like herself. She looked like she hadn’t slept. Had she been crying? Bobby knew something was off before the door shut behind her. He tried to act as if everything was normal and greeted her.

  “Good afternoon. Welcome to the Daily Grind.”

  She did not respond immediately. Instead, she chewed on her bottom lip. Bobby was getting antsy when she finally spoke.

  “Bobby, have I done something wrong?”

  She didn’t give him time to respond; instead, she continued talking while Bobby reached for a cup, unsure of what to do. He felt cornered.

  “I feel. Well, I just feel like you have been kind of short with me since the other day with Mike and I haven’t seen you at the park either. Are you avoiding me?”

  Bobby puffed out his cheeks and blew out a defeated breath.

  “No. Everything’s fine. I’ve just been distracted, I guess. I haven’t been avoiding you. I thought we were just missing each other at the park.”

  His lie made him feel weak. There was no reason to avoid Danielle. There was no reason for him to act like a second grader with his first crush. Shame crawled up his spine and rested in his face, causing it to turn a dark red. Danielle either didn’t notice or acted like she hadn’t.

  “Oh. Well, how about today then?”

  “How? How about today what?” he choked out.

  “How about today we walk in the park like we talked about?” she said, now smiling and staring
directly at Bobby. Her emerald eyes lit up with a fire Bobby had never seen before.

  “Uh… yeah,” was all Bobby could get out before he turned around to make her coffee. Today was Friday. She always went to the park with her dog on Tuesday, Thursday, and most Saturdays. She was changing her routine for him. A surge of excitement welled up within Bobby. She had changed her schedule to be with him, she actually wanted to go with him, not just spend time with him because they were both there and had nobody else. Bobby got so flustered he almost spilled Danielle’s coffee on her.

  “Whoa. Sorry. My hand was wet.”

  Danielle laughed at him and turned to leave.

  “I don’t have time to stay today. We have been really busy next door, but I’ll see you later. I’ll meet you beside the playground at 5:30. Okay?”

  “Sounds good.” Bobby watched her walk out the door and pass by the window. The S in Shoppe perfectly silhouetted her head and neck. When she turned the corner, he sat down at the counter until the door chime signaled the beginning of the lunch rush.

  Bobby watched the clock slide to five, said his goodbyes and shuffled to the door. Outside, the early spring air still had a wintery blade that cut deep, making people rethink not grabbing a light jacket on the way out the door. He kicked a rock from outside the coffee shop all the way to the park. He lost the rock when his last kick sent it sailing into the parking lot, mixing in with the gravel. He sat down on a park bench beside the playground. The older children ran through the soft sand, and climbed up the slide from the wrong end, blocking the smaller ones who were trying to come down. Suddenly feeling awkward watching the kids without one of his own on the playground, Bobby rotated on the bench in time to see Danielle letting Charlie out of the backseat of her car. She smiled and waved when she saw him. Charlie pulled at his leash, trying to escape. Bobby was still sitting on the bench when Danielle closed in on him. He attempted to stand, but Charlie jumped up on him and pushed him back down to the bench.